Enjoy Ya Life

To live life is to enjoy it!

I wake up at 1pm on a Monday. I lay in bed and stare at my phone for about two hours. Nature forces me out of bed with the urge to relieve myself. The wooden floor is cold as I consider diving back under the covers from all threats of comfort. Every day is a repetition of the birthing experience, except I can leave the womb at my leisure. And leisure is just what I desire. I return to my bed, and even more so my phone to finish the remainder of a movie.

When I open the last door between me and the outside world, the light hits my eyes and I squint how one might do so at 7am. It’s 4pm. I walk the streets of Mexico City thinking of what to eat. I settle on tacos – again. The aggressive combination of meat, cheese, and as a consequence, grease is a craving that cannot be squelched. I walk to reach the arbitrary number someone else set, 10,000 steps, to qualify as having done some form of exercise. Simultaneously, I listen to an audiobook to finish the book as fast as possible to qualify as having done some form of learning. Once both tasks are completed I turn to return to my apartment.

Just as I’m about to reach the restroom, my dear Airbnb hosts calls out from the dining room to see how I’m doing. My world-traveling host has just as many stories as the bible. As I sit there listening while holding my bladder, I realize this is my first full conversation with someone other than myself. I feel a warmth flicker in my chest region and nearly upon my thigh before taking my exit to run to the bathroom. At this point, it’s already nightfall.

As I rest into my phone in the same position I started the day, I get this sense of dread. It’s a feeling that I’ve wasted the 24 hours I’ve been graciously granted. Even though the constant flow of content, acts an emotional sort of cover, there’s no removing the feeling entirely. I go to bed at 3am – but not before eating another tantalizing combo of fat, protein, and carbs. And with that I close my eyes at 3am, ready to do it all over again.

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I think this story is as old as time itself – we’ve all seen it in a dozen movies.

Taking an example from my youth: Jimmy Neutron, the cartoon boy genius with the giant head, is a story of how life without constraints can get old. Here’s a breakdown all by memory, mind you:

Part 1: Jimmy & friends get tired of their parents and their rules

Part 2: The aliens kidnap the parents, leaving kids to their own devices

Part 3: Kids do whatever they want like running up a downward moving escalator

Part 4: Kids tire of no rules and excessive amounts of fun

Part 5: Set on to save parents to get back order into their lives

You would think that watching this movie several dozen times would make sure if I come across such a problem I’d have Jimmy Neutron’s signature “brain blast”, a solution to the immediate problem, and run in the other direction.

Alas...

If you took the above story and added my past 9-5 job in the middle, what you may notice is the same attitude present. The sense that nothing really mattered pervades through the central theme. In fact, past articles show this same sort of negative floundering – disliking my current situation, but I continuing to muck through it regardless. And I use humor to act as a redeeming quality of my suffering prolonging my continuance with the attitude.

However, it’s clear both spending a chunk of my time dedicated to something i don’t like AND spending time doing whatever I want is not enjoying life!

We come to believe that enjoying life is akin to eating a hamburger or laying in a hammock on a beach with the alcoholic refreshment of your choice. In short, it’s the pursuit of pleasure. But if you finish that triple-patty hamburger with french fries (that’s right) caked in between each section plus a chocolate-vanilla milkshake, can you really say after that you’re enjoying life?

Enjoying life needs to be stretched to include worthy projects that can be difficult oftentimes to even start, but feel good when you note your progress or complete what you set out to start. It’s choosing discomfort oftentimes with the intent of breaking through to something wonderful with maybe a hamburger in there every now and then.

It’s choosing your own daring path.

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Despite the late-night yesterday, it’s 9am as I open my eyes with a tummy full of grease. The desire to stay in bed immediately flashes in my mind. Without hesitation and without listening to my thoughts, I get up on my own two feet. The world is almost dizzy, but I am awake.

The prior day was 1pm wake-up call to 9am. I’d say we’re making progress. Baby steps, baby steps.